ADHD and Decision Fatigue: 5 Practical Strategies to Reduce Mental Overload
Understanding Decision Fatigue in Adults with ADHD
Written by: Anna Enfield, M.A.
Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental condition that affects executive functioning—the mental skills that help us plan, organize, and make decisions. For many adults with ADHD, decision making can feel overwhelming. Research estimates that humans make nearly 35,000 decisions per day, from small choices like what to eat for breakfast to larger daily tasks like planning work projects. For those with ADHD, this constant decision-making can quickly lead to decision fatigue.
What is Decision Fatigue?
Decision fatigue occurs when repeated decision-making depletes your mental energy. For people with ADHD, this can result in:
Procrastination due to mental exhaustion
Impulsive choices made without full consideration
Indecision or avoidance of important tasks
Strained relationships or professional challenges
Over time, decision fatigue can impact your productivity, reputation, and overall well-being.
5 Strategies to Reduce Decision Fatigue with ADHD Excitement and Reliability
1. Ask for Help
Sharing your mental load with trusted friends, family, or colleagues can help you manage daily responsibilities and free up cognitive resources for important decisions.
2. Organize Your Decisions
Use a daily or weekly task list to prioritize tasks. Breaking down responsibilities and keeping a visual plan reduces overwhelm and supports better decision-making.
3. Set Boundaries
Learn to say “no” when your energy is low. Protecting your time and mental space prevents burnout and ensures that important decisions receive your full attention.
4. Batch Smaller Tasks
Group routine or repetitive tasks together, such as paying bills or meal prepping. This reduces the number of decisions you must make each day and helps maintain focus on larger priorities.
5. Practice Self-Compassion
Decision fatigue is a common experience for people with ADHD. Remind yourself that difficulty making decisions does not reflect your value. Consider working with a therapist to develop strategies tailored to your executive functioning needs.
Bottom Line:
Adults with ADHD often face challenges with executive functioning that make everyday decision-making exhausting. By implementing strategies like asking for support, organizing tasks, setting boundaries, batching routine responsibilities, and practicing self-compassion, you can reduce decision fatigue, improve productivity, and strengthen both personal and professional relationships.
Weekly therapy sessions offer a safe space to develop strategies, with expert guidance to work through personal challenges and grow stronger.
Learn more about our ADHD therapy services at Inner Wave Therapy.
Schedule a consultation with us to learn how we can support you!
Loving with ADHD: Navigating Passion, Forgetfulness, and Emotional Intensity
Explore how ADHD impacts love and relationships. Learn how emotional intensity, impulsivity, and forgetfulness shape connections and practical strategies to thrive together.
Written by: Thomas Flanagan, M.A.
Loving with ADHD: Navigating Passion and Forgetfulness
ADHD doesn’t just affect focus, it shapes how people feel, act, and love. Relationships with someone who has ADHD can be thrilling, spontaneous, and deeply passionate, but they also bring unique challenges. Understanding these dynamics is key to building a strong, lasting connection
How ADHD Shapes Emotional Intensity and Spontaneity in Love
People with ADHD often feel emotions more deeply and intensely. This can create moments of hyperfocus on a partner: overflowing affection, excitement, and attention that feels intoxicating.
At the same time, ADHD brains crave novelty and stimulation. Love can feel like an ongoing adventure, full of spontaneous gestures, last-minute trips, or surprise declarations. But impulsivity may lead to missed plans or forgotten tasks like anniversaries or bills, which can create friction.
Bottom line: ADHD amplifies love: bigger emotions, bigger gestures, and occasionally bigger misunderstandings.
These challenges can be worked on in couples therapy, with the support of a professional who truly understands ADHD and its impact on relationship dynamics.
Common Misunderstandings in Relationships with ADHD
Even in loving relationships, ADHD can lead to confusion. Here are five frequent misconceptions:
“You don’t care because you forgot.” Forgetfulness stems from working memory challenges, not lack of love.
“You never listen.” Distractibility isn’t intentional; ADHD brains often juggle multiple thoughts at once.
“You’re inconsistent.” Motivation cycles tied to ADHD may look like unreliability, but commitment remains.
“You’re overreacting.” Emotional intensity can make small issues feel overwhelming; compassion helps.
“You’re impulsive just to be difficult.” Impulsivity often comes from a need for stimulation, not disregard, and can add spontaneity and fun.
Strategies for Balancing Excitement and Reliability
Thriving with ADHD in a relationship requires practical strategies alongside emotional understanding:
Create Shared Systems, Not Blame
Shared calendars, reminders, and notes turn forgetfulness into teamwork rather than tension.Focus on Emotional Awareness
Mindfulness, CBT, and couples therapy can help partners navigate highs and lows together.Celebrate ADHD Strengths
Creativity, humor, enthusiasm, and empathy can enhance intimacy and deepen connection.Have Open and Honest Conversations
Weekly therapy sessions offer couples a safe space to connect deeply, with expert guidance to work through personal challenges and grow stronger together.
Learn more about our ADHD therapy services at Inner Wave Therapy.
Embracing ADHD in Relationships
ADHD doesn’t make relationships harder, it makes them different. By embracing the unique lens ADHD provides, couples can enjoy deeper understanding, heightened passion, and a love that’s vibrant and real.
Schedule a consultation with us to learn how we can support you and your relationship!
ADHD and Perfectionism: Why Saying “I’m Fine” Hides Your True Struggle
Written by: Anna Enfield, M.A.
If you have ADHD and perfectionism, you may find yourself saying “I’m fine” even when you’re struggling. This pattern is common and affects emotional honesty, self-awareness, and mental well-being. Understanding the intersection of ADHD and perfectionism is the first step to breaking this cycle.
The ADHD + Perfectionism Connection
ADHD often brings emotional intensity, distractibility, and difficulty regulating feelings. Perfectionism adds high internal standards, fear of failure, and self-criticism. Together, they create a tendency to deny distress and default to “I’m fine,” even when it isn’t true.
How These Traits Interact
Emotional Intensity + Self-Critique: Feeling overwhelmed while judging yourself for “not handling it.”
Impulsivity + Fear of Mistakes: Acting or speaking before processing, while worrying about appearing flawed.
Avoidance + High Standards: Denying distress to maintain a sense of control or competence.
Why People With ADHD and Perfectionism Say “I’m Fine”
Common reasons include:
Conflict Avoidance: Avoiding arguments or criticism.
Internalized Perfectionism: Feeling struggle equals failure.
Denial as a Coping Tool: Suppressing feelings to manage overwhelm.
Learned Childhood Patterns: Growing up in environments where emotions were minimized.
When Denying Distress Is Helpful—and When It Isn’t
Helpful:
Maintaining professional boundaries
Protecting privacy in stressful situations
Harmful:
Safety is at risk for self or others
Chronic avoidance blocks self-awareness and emotional growth
It prevents meaningful connections with others
Learn more about our ADHD therapy services at Inner Wave Therapy.
Strategies for Emotional Honesty With ADHD + Perfectionism
Notice Your Feelings
Track emotions using journaling, mindfulness, or body scans. ADHD can make emotions feel chaotic; perfectionism may label them wrong.
Name It Without Judgment
Use statements like “I feel frustrated” or “I’m overwhelmed”—not as failure, but as awareness.
Start Small With Sharing
Practice honesty in safe spaces or with trusted people first.
Reframe Strength
Emotional honesty is resilience, not weakness.
Celebrate Wins
Every acknowledgment of discomfort weakens the ADHD + perfectionism denial cycle.
Why Emotional Honesty Matters
Emotional denial can feel automatic for those with ADHD and perfectionism, but being honest with yourself and others improves:
Self-awareness and insight
Relationship quality and intimacy
Mental health and emotional regulation
Ability to break the cycle of denial
Final Thoughts
ADHD and perfectionism often intersect to create patterns of emotional denial.
Saying “I’m fine” is understandable but can prevent growth and connection.
Small steps toward emotional honesty are a form of strength.
You don’t have to be perfectly okay to be strong. Acknowledge your feelings, embrace authenticity, and take small steps toward emotional honesty for a more fulfilling life. At Inner Wave Therapy, we support people in building these skills every day.
Schedule a consultation with us to learn how we can support you.
Raising Emotionally Resilient Kids with ADHD:
10 Powerful Phrases Parents Can Use
Written by: Thomas Flanagan, M.A.
Parenting a child with ADHD can feel like navigating daily ups and downs—big feelings, impulsive reactions, and challenges with focus or frustration. But one of the greatest gifts you can give your child is emotional resilience: the ability to bounce back, regulate emotions, and keep trying when things get tough.
What Emotional Resilience Looks Like in Kids with ADHD
Resilience isn’t about never crying or losing your temper—it’s about recovering and learning. For kids with ADHD, that might look like:
Regrouping after setbacks (like homework struggles).
Naming and sharing feelings instead of acting out.
Brainstorming solutions and asking for help.
Showing empathy, even when emotions run high.
Believing mistakes are chances to grow.
Why Emotional Resilience Matters for Children with ADHD
Kids with ADHD often feel emotions intensely, which can leave them discouraged or overwhelmed. Building resilience helps protect their mental health, strengthen friendships, and boost motivation. Research even shows that naming feelings helps the brain calm down and that praising effort over ability builds persistence.
Protects Mental Health
Builds Motivation & Growth Mindset
Strengthens Relationships
Supports Adaptability
Learn more about our ADHD therapy services at Inner Wave Therapy.
10 Phrases That Foster Emotional Resilience in Kids with ADHD
Try weaving these into daily life:
“I believe you.” – Builds trust and openness.
“It’s okay to make mistakes.” – Normalizes imperfection.
“What can we learn from this?” – Encourages growth.
“Let’s figure this out together.” – Offers support without taking over.
“How does that make you feel?” – Builds emotional vocabulary.
“Your effort really made a difference.” – Reinforces persistence.
“It’s hard—and you can do hard things.” – Fosters confidence.
“Take a breath; let’s start small.” – Teaches regulation and problem-solving.
“Would you like help, or do you want to try first?” – Balances autonomy and support.
“Feelings come and go; I’m right here.” – Normalizes emotions and provides safety.
Phrases to Avoid (and What to Say Instead)
Some common phrases undermine resilience, especially for kids with ADHD:
“Stop crying, you’re fine.” → Try: “I see you’re upset. Do you want a hug or a break?”
“Because I said so.” → Try: “Here’s why. Let’s talk about when it might work.”
“Don’t be so sensitive.” → Try: “That really bothered you. What might help right now?”
“You know better than that.” → Try: “What happened, and what can you do differently next time?”
Final Thoughts
Resilience grows in everyday moments—bedtime talks, car rides, even homework battles. For children with ADHD, the words you choose can turn challenges into stepping stones toward confidence and flexibility. At Inner Wave Therapy, we support families in building these skills every day.
Schedule a consultation with us to learn how we can support your child.